Was I even away?

I'm back from my trip southwards to my old haunt of London town. As usual the rational to head down for work related activities was little more than an excuse to catch up with friends I see but too infrequently, attend a couple of Christmas parties, do some shopping, cook for friends, attend the theatre and exchange presents and cards. And in between that I even managed to squeeze in some work.

In the spirit of delayed gratification that so personifies the festive period, let's look at work first and save the fun stuff for later. Well, I say "look" at work, when what I really want to do is rant a little, primarily about our marketing department. They're currently touting our wares to potential clients in the hope of securing the ever desirable new sources of revenue. I've really no problem with them doing that - money coming into the company is good, since it eventually filters down the financial food chain into my pocket. Definitely a good thing. However, I think their methods are slightly suspect. In general they say "yes" a little more than they should. As in "Can we have this extremely complex web site set up by the beginning of January?" "Yes". In case you haven't realised it, at least in this instance, "yes" really wasn't the right answer. In fact, "no" would be been considerably more accurate.

I can understand it if this were to happen once, but it's an all too frequent occurrence. Marketing promise clients the world, sign binding contracts, and then get upset when they're told that there's no way in hell we can actually deliver on their promises. This latest example is really just the perfect example of that. A deadline was promised, to have a website ready for the beginning of January,and as soon as the technical team looked at the specs we knew that this was never going to happen. The first step involves porting the client's data from an absurdly complex mish-mash of sql and xml into our database. During a 5 hour meeting with the client on Tuesday we calculated that importing the data alone is likely to take longer than entire development period estimated by the marketing department. And that doesn't actually include any development. A more realistic estimate will be the middle of February. Why didn't anyone bother to consult the development team before deadlines were set in stone? I've no idea. I'd like to say I don't really care but that's only true to an extent - I don't have to work to impossible deadlines, rather I'll work to a considerably more realistic estimate. No-one will yell at me for it, and the marketing department, or whoever signed this deal will take the heat for over-promising and under delivering. The CEO of the client company has already had several angry conversations about the delay. But the truth is I do care. I care that my company is, in my estimation, lying to clients in order to secure work. It's wrong. I've spoken with my manager about this issue before, but nothing ever seems to come of it. Still, my time with the company is reaching it's twilight one way or the other, so I've accepted that things are unlikely to change and my will to change them is waning..

But enough of work. On the social side of things, my visit was carefully scheduled to coincide with both the company Christmas party, and a smaller gathering for the department. The office Christmas party almost seemed to be a stereotypical example of the breed. Admittedly, it took place at a proper venue outside of the office, thus limiting the potential for photocopier shenanigans, but aside from that you can pretty imagine the scene. Food and drink in copious quantities with night ending with many a person looking much the worse for wear as a result. During dessert it was pointed out that I seem to have rather a high tolerance for rich and sweet food. From my perspective I've never encountered a dessert I've considered to rich or too sweet but this seemed to be the exception at the table, rather than the rule. Most people gave up on the dessert, a passable chocolate, mousse, after a few mouthfuls. I myself stopped after three. Mousses that is. It was worth it for the bemused expression on people's faces. Plus it was chocolate.

The department party was a much more sedate affair by comparison, and all the more enjoyable for me as a result. Just a small group of people enjoying dinner at a small restaurant in Richmond. Good company, thoroughly enjoyable food (I dined in a particularly succulent slab of swordfish, followed up with a chocolate creme brulee which was every bit as good as it sounds), and Des Lynam, who was enjoying a meal at the table next to us and consequently had to put up with people sneaking surreptitious glances and whispering to the person sitting next to us "Is that...?" It was a good reminder of the high cost of fame.

And inbetween parties I also got the chance to watch Patrick Stewart performing his one man rendition of Dicken's Christmas Carol. Absolutely splendid stuff. Beg, borrow or steal a ticket if you have to. On a near empty stage, with only the most minimal of props to work with, Stewart brought the play to life. Every character portrayed perfectly, he told the story faultlessly. It was like the best Jackanory there never was, and the perfect accompaniment to the season. I should say more but I'm really not going to do it justice. Superlatives apply - go see it.

Right, I'm off to bed now, it's been a long few days...